Fascinating things about fascinating things

Tonight you shall learn that I am in the habit of watching excessive amounts of television. When I was young, I read a lot. Now that I'm older and my brain is deader I'm more able to focus on pictures of reality generated by someone else's imagination.

I'm assuming that you don't watch all of the same shows as me. As a result, I'm going to provide summaries of some of the shows I watch.

*important disclaimer*
If I ever recommend a TV show, movie, or book, you may want to ask me whether I like the TV show, movie or book, or if I like the IDEA of the TV show, movie, or book. It is an important distinction. For example, I recommended Max Barry's book Jennifer Government to a few people because it is the philosophical antithesis of Ayn Rand's Atlas Shrugged (which, incidentally, I thought was a dumb book. If I'm really bored one of these days I'll give you the joy of a book report--maybe even comparing and contrasting the "dangers of extreme capitalism" book with the "dangers of extreme socialism" book. What a treat that will be.). After taking me up on my recommendation, someone asked if I really enjoyed the book. I had to think about it for a minute. Realistically, the plot was weak, and by the ending it all sort of fell apart. But I was so intrigued with the IDEA of the book--and, in particular, the contrast with Ayn Rand's "masterpiece"--that I had forgotten that I didn't even like it that much.
*end important disclaimer*

Now that you've endured my warning, you get to the good part. Here's more than you ever needed to know about the TV shows I watch:

- Lost - My sister and I watched all of Seasons 1 and 2 over Columbus Day weekend (a.k.a. Indigenous People's Day, in selected parts of California; a.k.a. Indigent People's Day, according to my mom who forgot that it was really Indigenous and not Indigent) last year. Season 3 has been rather disappointing. What's up with the torture plot lines? But I watch it anyway, hoping that Benry really is Radiohead singer Thom Yorke and at any moment is going to break out into a fantastic rendition of my favorite song. Incidentally, this is the best Radiohead video. It's deep, just like Lost tries to be. And we come full circle.

- Heroes - Comic book style stories are very popular right now, aren't they? When I first saw the previews for this show, I thought it was a fictional story based on stories of people who are nice to other people -- help the old lady across the street and that sort of thing. Apparently my mind skipped over the "flying human" and "stopping time by wrinkling your nose" themes. Um, how did I miss that?? At one point someone described the actual plot, and I decided to watch it. I do like this show, though I can't stand the Las Vegas schizophrenic woman and associated plotline. Ugh. That branch of the overall story needs to end.

- Top Design - I'm a big Project Runway and Top Chef fan--after all, who could forget Project Runway's post office challenge or the garden episode, or the Top Chef monkfish episode? The creativity is spectacular. Not just the creativity of the contestants, but the creativity of whoever develops those seriously twisted challenges. When I first heard about Top Design, I had high expectations. They were not met. The one noteworthy thing about Top Design is the fact that judge Kelly Wearstler is trying hard to look like a damsel in distress from a Waterhouse painting. The examples are here and here and here and here and here. Is she starved for attention? It's as if she's trying to take the focus off the contest and contestants, and make herself the "story of the show." Unfortunately, given the boring contestant interactions and blah plotlines, she's succeeding.

- America's Next Top Model - Seriously, I watch this show. No, it's not for the catfights. It has some great dialogue ("I know, right?"), and plot twists (Russian mail order bride??). But if you're really interested in my primary reason for watching ANTM, you'll have to visit my blog this weekend..

- American Idol - It's fascinating to see the confidence. These people really believe they are the best. It reminds me of this video (specifically, watch 4:24-5:26. Peter Serafinowicz, you ARE a pop idol.)

- Psych - Ahh, the sweet, sweet sarcasm. I'm more than a little bitter about the short duration of this show's "seasons." How could it be over already?? It's almost as depressing as the 6-episode British comedy "seasons." In my heart I've already purchased the DVD.

Yeah. Too much TV.